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Rabbi´s Message, from January 2006 bulletin: Winter has finally arrived, and with it the season of visiting and traveling – when others flock to Tahoe many of us leave for other destinations, hoping to find a break from the every day beautiful place that we call home. In our fast paced society, and yes, even in Northern Nevada we drive ourselves pretty hard, many of us strongly emphasize trying to get the most out of our time. We can make and answer phone calls while driving, attend to multiple tasks on the computer at the same time, and push ourselves right up to the moment that we need to leave town for whatever vacation we have planned. Believe it or not, Judaism actually has something to say about how we enter into our times off. Shabbat is our model for time without obligations. In order to do Shabbat well, we need to prepare for it. If one were more strictly observant than most of us that would mean taking most of Friday to cook and clean and prepare for a time when one wouldn’t be cooking or cleaning or preparing. So in order to get a day of stopping from the rest of the week, we actually have to take additional time, just to get that day to work right. I often try to work into the beginning of our Shabbat events a couple of moments where we work to leave the rest of the week behind. Usually, this barely suffices to create a truly separate space. Few of us take the traditional afternoon to try to prepare ourselves for even a day off – I wonder how much preliminary work we do on ourselves when we try to take a whole week or more away from the every day. I know this has happened to me, and many of you may have experienced it as well – the first couple of days away on vacation are spent working to relax enough before we can actually enjoy ourselves. Alternately, some of us probably experience varying degrees of let-downs when the things we’ve planned don’t match our expectations. So, I have a few suggestions as we enter into this time of travel and recreating for better use of our time and energy, even if it may not feel more efficient. Mind you, they are also recommendations for me, as Ginny can tell you, I often do not abide by any of these! First, let’s do our best to not make plans that push us quickly from our work and family obligations right up to departure – set aside structured time to pack and drive to the airport and prepare what you want to bring for others. Rushing off to try to relax seems a little contrary to the goal of the time off. Second, if being away from work causes us more stress than being there to attend to things that might not get done in our absence, then the vacation means nothing. We need to plan ahead, far ahead, for being gone, so that when gone, we do not worry too much about being away. If the pressures of our work lives follow us out of town, when we are supposed to be enjoying ourselves, again, the time will not be well-spent. This planning may appear very different for each of us, but whatever it takes to make your time away work as time away is time well spent. Of course, we need to be careful to plan well enough so that we don’t overburden ourselves before the vacation as well. This also means we cannot take our work with us – if we spend more time connecting to our work while on vacation then when we are not, again, vacation doesn’t serve its purpose. Third, we need to work on our expectations for our time away – this can take any form of some dedicated mental space starting as early as a month before leaving. We can really work on anticipating things about our destination, and things that we may, or especially, may not, get out of our time there. As an example, say we will be spending time with the side of the family that keeps us hopping to activities and talking all the time. Then we shouldn’t expect to get a lot of reading and relaxing done. Figure out where we’re going, what we’re doing, and don’t create an expectation that doesn’t fit those anticipated plans. This can also take the form of some spiritual preparation to get ourselves into the inner place from which we get the most out of our time away. Working on these three things, however badly I often accomplish them, helps me to get more out of those precious times that I designate for rest and relaxation. Plan in time to move to things without rushing, plan for your absence, and work on our expectations – I hope that these three suggestions help all of us get more of what we want out of our extended Shabbat times as they arrive in the coming months. May we all find rest, relaxation, and rejuvenation, in both our day-to-day lives, and in the time that we designate for those goals. Happy December everyone!
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